By suspicious fortune, a good sized group ended up gathered at what will heretofore be referred to as #TeamHellaSwag Headquarters and we had a pretty great time taking silly pictures (<—) and dancing around to tight music (thanks impromptu DJ!). At some point, a few hours in, someone suggested that we make moves to Harlot, where his friend was promoting an event. I protested (where were we going to find better music and people? Definitely not the closet sized Harlot), but was eventually outvoted, as indicated by the mass exodus I encountered after snapping my head up in a poor imitation of zSwag’s signature move.
I shouldn’t have gone. I should have listened to the voice in my head saying ‘Go home. You’re exhausted from the work week; you have an early day ahead of you; you don’t like this club; Go.Home.’ To my credit, when a new acquaintance asked if I’d known Guy X, with whom he’d gone to high school, because Guy X and I had attended the same college, I only peed a little. I had, in fact, not only known, but dated Guy X for three years. I should have known at this point, that no more good could come from this night.
As I entered Harlot (let me just step around this line right here. . . I may be sad and tired, but I’m still fly), still reeling in shock from the reminder of the X I’ve been so desperately trying to forget, stewing in the sheer injustice of his increasingly frequently and confounding appearances in my life (and being maybe, possibly, just a little dramatic), one thought permeated . . . THIS MUSIC.IS.BAD. As it turned to worse, I looked around to see another mass exodus before me. I wasn’t sure what was going on, but hopped on the tail of it (because girls make the best soldiers, duh) only to find out that we were headed upstairs to V.I.P. (whatup?!). To make a long night short, I didn’t last much longer, deciding to take me and my rain cloud home and save the rest of my party.
I was a sad sack for the last part of the night (SORRY GUYS), and to make up for it/ in the interest of living the best #swaglife possible, I present:
* On our grown ‘n sexy, TeamHellaSwag began the night with the use of a decanter. A probable first for these very young 20-somethings.
* I got to hear TinaBelle rap, in true T.Lo.Swag form, and see the hilarious and shocked reactions from our new friends
* I got to trot out my new fab ‘do before it was ruined by SF rain, and the gym.
* Walked it out for the first time in years, and got to show the crew my Dougie @Headquarters (again THANK YOU DJ)