Unless a bear has given chase, I don’t believe in running. The same is basically true for all other kinds of purposeful physical activity. I think it’s boring and painful and stupid. I really, really, wish I didn’t, but that doesn’t change the fact. If you can believe it, this inclination is actually good for my injury-riddled, asthma-suffering body. Unfortunately, it is very bad for my waist line. Womp.

I have been trying to cope with the sedentary lifestyle that inevitably follows the transition to  “adult life”  (WTH? When’d that happen?). My issue is, I’m too lazy, and too exhausted, and too overworked, and too pain-averse to voluntarily *GO TO THE GYM*, but would love to stop the train to tubby-town that left the station the day of my college graduation. To exacerbate these difficulties, I’m coming off years as an athlete. I ran track at a highly competitive level as a child and continued with the sport through college. I’m not saying I was the best (although this one time, I was), but the point is I worked out for 18 hours a week, every week, because someone made me.

I was a part of a team, I wanted to drop my time, my coach would kill me, I wanted to win, I suffer from an at times crippling predisposition to “keeping my word”I had plenty of reasons to show up to practice everyday. Now, however none of these motivators apply, and it’s just me and my lack of hand-eye coordination trying to get me back to “slimmy” status.

I’ve tried all kinds of ways to trick myself into exercising:


Hula hooping – Of course there are hula hooping classes in San Francisco, and yes I tried one. It was FUN, but expensive, for something I used to do for free after chasing earthworms 15 years ago.

Bikram Yoga – Basically, I sweated half my face off and actually, nearly passed out. *Embarrassing*

Boot Camp – Even though I paid for 14 days of classes, I only made it to one, because . . .why is she YELLING AT ME?? #ontothenext

Regular Going to the Gym – Just boring enough to make summering in a sensory deprivation chamber sound appealing.

Spinning – It’s like aerobic weight lifting in a darkened room and I love it! This may be the one, guys, IF I can get myself out of work and to the gym . . .

Having zSwag as a workout partner has definitely helped, but our lack of experience with ball sports has hindered us in our quest to find exciting ways to play and stay healthy get skinny. Do you guys have any advice?!

#SwagLife,

~dubs. 

Photo Credit 1
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Stay Fly!

~#TeamHellaSwag

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